Reality of the Anxious Mind

Life is real

Anxious mind wonders and never stops. It’s up to me how I treat it and how I approach it. I tend to get annoyed at the fact that I always worry too much. I overanalyse different happenings in my life. I let my thoughts be and I block them from affecting my life as much as I can.

Don’t Give Up – It comes, it goes, sometimes its worse than other times but at the end of the day you will get over it.

Life is real

‘Don’t aim for big steps as that will only set you back. Focus on something small on move on from that. Every step forward is a big success and its okay to have the off day, we all do. But don’t lose sight of the goal.’
– Problematique86

Mental Health SeeSaw

Samaritans – How we can Help

The talk of taking ones life has hit my senses more often than i can take. I feel for the families and friends of those who have experienced the loss of a loved one. What hurts the most is sometimes the simple question – Why? Why make those plans with me? Why leave me? Why didn’t i see this?

Truth is and it hurts the most to know that no one will ever know. People will say they were selfish for taking their own life but the reality of it is that they believed that the world was better of without them. They were not being selfish. They were hurting. They were blocked from happiness and anyone who calls it the easy way out does not understand the reality of living with a mental illness.

I once came close it being a statistic myself…

View original post 484 more words

Mental Pain & Suicide

Life is real

Don’t Suffer In Silence
LET IT OUT
and
LIVE
We are here to LISTEN

Mental Health SeeSaw

I was raised as a person who was meant to follow the path of the Roman Catholic Church. I refused to adhere to it and as a result of my decision I faced fair amount of prejudice. When I was a teenager I searched for people who would soothe my battered soul and who would understand me.
Unfortunately, I searched and I experienced faiths but I didn’t find any fairness and understanding which I was looking for.
I do believe in God because it gives me comfort but I also follow my own path of being a decent human being. I adore Buddhism and its principles and values. I’m not a Buddhist and I will never label myself as one but Buddhism has a special place in my heart. It has helped me to understand the true beauty & meaning of life. Thich Nhat Hanh is my hero.
https://plumvillage.org/about/thich-nhat-hanh/
You…

View original post 465 more words

Eating Disorder

Life is real

The story about my struggle with the eating disorder.

Mental Health SeeSaw

I had suffered from an eating disorder for many years. I used to emotionally overeat (binge), starve myself and exercise in order to burn the calories I had consumed. It was impossible for me to eat in public places as I felt constantly observed and looked at by strangers. I hated my body and I felt ashamed of it. I avoided mirrors at any cost because in my opinion I didn’t meet the beauty standards. I mentally abused myself by calling my body & inner-self names-” Ugly pig”, “Disgusting fat monster”, “Fat retard”, “Fat looser”etc. I didn’t feel worth of being loved and cared for. I had isolated myself from the world and let the abuse from myself & my ex to take over my life.

It took me a long time to overcome horrible thoughts and overwhelming emotional state which encouraged frequent and regular binge eating sessions. I used…

View original post 278 more words

I Don’t Understand 

Life is real

There are many things which I can’t fully comprehend. For instance, I don’t understand people’s foolishness, violence and arrogance. How pathetic can you be to physically abuse any living creature?   How stupid can you be to pull out the gun and threat another human being with it?  Does it make you powerful and strong? OR Is it a safety net and some sort of aid for your rotting brain cells. Violence & cruelty is always a sign of weakness!!!  I am disgusted and angry that parasites like this are on the Earth. 

360 Anxiety

Life is real

An experience which is difficult to cope with and requires strength & stamina to move forward with daily life.

http://wp.me/p7zvtk-5x

Mental Health SeeSaw

Everyone who has suffered from anxiety knows about the mood swings, the loss of breathe and the panic that ensues.

Slowly but surely the trigger that we had we recognize and can spot the signs sooner each time.

But sadly we are never limited to one thing that triggers anxiety in ourselves.

Are We?

No.

From someone walking behind me to not replying to be in a large group of people as some to mention i have adapted and understand what my body is doing in each of these scenarios but now being in a traffic accident today i now have to add sitting in a car to my list.

Whilst stationary in traffic another driver who i believe was doing over 30 -35mph went into the back of my car surging myself forward and into the rear of another vehicle who then collided with another.

I can remember the…

View original post 222 more words

I Hate Myself 

Life is real, Uncategorized

Do I hate myself? No, I don’t hate myself- I love myself  but I used to despise myself with the all mighty heart & soul. I thought I didn’t meet beauty standards and I mentally felt retarded because I’ve been highly sensitive, moody, introverted and scarred due to neglect and emotional abuse which occurred throughout my existence. I was disgusted with the size of my body, uneven colour of my skin, stretchmarks, loose skin, a big bum and funny teeth. I went through it all –  bullying, an eating disorder, anxiety, depression and panic attacks….

Remember, negative childhood doesn’t guarantee you unhappy life, same with the stable nest- it doesn’t protect you from the bad in the world. It depends on us- humans.

It took me a long while to realise it. I blamed everyone but me because I was convinced that my existence was pitiful and cursed. What I didn’t notice was that I was drawn to negative influences. I can compare it to standing in the middle of the motorway and waiting for being hit by a truck. When I decided to stay away from spiteful parasites and put my well-being on the first place things began to change for better.

Nature helped me a lot together with active meditation. Thich Nhat Hanh has been my mentor. He directed me (through his books) towards the path of mentally sober reality which needs to be challenged and constantly stimulated.  The mentally sober reality consist of better, neutral and worse experiences residing in our Universe. It solely depends on us of how we utilize them.

I’ve met good souls including my partner who supports me and understands me. He loves my good sides, emotional quirks and physical appearance – He loves me simply for who I am. Our relationship is based on mutual respect and honesty. He is my life partner whom I love for his true and real self. We are both equal.

I still find myself going through phases of self- pity and despair- especially when I have few obstacles to deal with but I have a better control over it as I know it has been my coping mechanism from as long I can remember. Nobody is perfect 🙂

I’m proud of who I am today and so you should be. We all complex, different and unique.