I have a confession to make lalala , I have a confession to make….. I’m obsessed with the bathtub …. I can’t get enough of sneaking in there and contemplating on my joyful existence. I occasionally stare at my Mummy & Daddy in the bathroom😂😂😂
The little Bib climbed up the flower stalk and saw a big giant eating cheesy, crunchy and frozen cookie socks. He snatched them from the giant and ran down the green plant stalk. The little Bib went back into his house and ground the cookie socks in to colourful dust. He felt extremely tired but he still decided to climb back up the flower stalk. When he reached the top he sprinkled the dust all over the plant. The flowers changed their colours and became brighter and more vivid. Petals were shiny , soft pink and beaming blue. The funny occurrence scared the giant, who had suffered from indigestion, and as a result of that he sadly exploded. His remains turned into compost and fertilised the surrounding forest. The little Bib lived happily ever after with a beautiful plant by his house.
It’s happened again… I fell into the bath tub. This is my pledge to you, despite you feeling paralysed with fear please DO NOT kill me as I contribute valuebly to your environmental world. Pick up a piece of paper or a jar and kindly use it to take me out of that bloody white coffin looking like bowl. It’s a slippery slippy slope for me so I need your help.
Mr Mittens Von Bob has been thinking a lot. He still claims that he doesn’t know what happened to feathery bastards or Miss Chick Long Legs but he has few words to share with you all about MANGOS. Here we go…
Mr Mittens Von Bob-
‘ I had a friend – Michelle Von Smitten ( I took a photo of her against her will).
She came over to my mansion with three suspiciously looking eggs. I was puzzled and dazzled by their beauty but appalled by their stench! It was such a pungent smell. At first, I acussed Michelle of blowing off- I said- Michelle you need to stop binging on pickled eggs because they make you pop! As much as you are dear to my heart I can’t stand the whiff of rotten cabbage entering my nostrils. Her reply was- What the fuck? I’m a self- proclaimed feminist and I can do whatever I want. I’m a liberated dog lady. I did not fart… the smell of gold you are sensing comes from these beauties ( she pointed at the golden eggs). I said- These are eggs…. are they pickled?! She answered-‘ They are MANGOS’ She went to cat- kitchen cupboard and opened it. She chose the biggest knife she could ever find and cut open three stinky eggs. I can’t remember what happened next as according to her I fainted and she needed to resuscitate me with my special catnip ( herbs and tobacco fellas). Since that moment my Lovers I hate MANGOS!!!!!!!!!
Yours truly best,
Mr Mittens Von Bob
Once upon time Mr Mittens Von Bob was friends with all kinds of birds in his twisted mind. He joyfully decided to visit his cousins- flying bastards by the bird feeder which was 10 metres away from a place he’d resided for years.
He packed his suitcase meticulously and took 10 minutes to actively meditate about his existence.
He completed his brain awakening contemplations and said goodbyes to Miss Spotty Vajaj.
Mr Mittens Von Bob left the mansion carrying an enormous suitcase on his tiny back stuffed with muscles. He was helped by Henrik the friendly neighbour who used his super power hairy legs to please Mittens and make him feel purrrrrrrrrrrrr- gooodilicious.
After 10 minutes Mr Mittens Von Bob was out and about greeting his lively and non suspicious cousins…
Something happenend, chirping and squeaking was heard, doomed silence creeped in to the village of the Shallow Pleasure. Mr Mittens Von Bob returned after 20 minutes and was awfully pleased with himself…
Miss Chick long legs also went missing….
If you have any information about missing featherly bastards please call : 666 666 666. You will be rewarded and blessed by the nature.