Reality Vs Expectations

The world

Mental health management and help provided by the healthcare system.

Mental Health See-Saw

Reality vs expectations pose a big dilemma…. surely something to think about.

Do we love the world we live in? Or we’d rather escape in to the land of eternal madness. I must admit, I’d love the other option to be available because I don’t understand this world anymore. I’m not the first or the last person to admit the fact that the mental health ignorance, injustice, violence, and political games disgust me. It makes us put different masks on in order to thrive and survive among sharks in this world. I truly admire musicians who spread the message about the reality of this world through their music without carefully threading words.


System of Down


Controversial, full of feelings, anger and emotions lyrics are often questioned by others who wrongly interpret them because how wrong is to speak up the truth or criticise precisely sculpured modern society.


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Blurry Morning

Motivational Blib Blob

Woke up with porridgy and blurry mind?

Mental Health See-Saw

Woke up with a porridgy and blurry mind? Do you feel like you can’t face the day?

It’s just your tired mind sending you signals that you must do something to unload the cargo consisting of worries and problems. You need to make some space for new arrivals.

Have you tried active meditation?

It’s simple, if you are in bed, focus on the surroundings, the softeness of the bedding and the way you are positioned in bed. Next, get up, walk towards the window and look through it. What can you see? Open it, don’t forget about breathing.




Look. Focus on every single details. What colour are the walls of the house next to yours? Are there any birds sitting on the roof? Crows, pigeons or Sparrows?

Do you feel any better?

You can do it.

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My Well

Precious Experiences

I imagine life to be an endless well without a bottom. Someone placed you just on the edge of it before you were born and then after  birth pushed you down into a never-ending hole wishing you – ”The best of luck’. This is where your life begins. You constantly fall at a speed that changes frequently. A slower pace is equal to good periods of your existence and a faster speed means problematic occurrences. 

Few years ago I was afraid of my well because I had experienced so much negativity during childhood, puberty and early adulthood. My father is a recovering alcoholic, my mother suffered from anxiety & depression, I had been bullied at school for three years, I had been married for five years to a person who had abused me emotionally and physically, I had suffered from an eating disorder and a depression and finally I have had anxiety since I was seven – years old. It occasionally affects my speech. 

I know very well that other people have struggled with a lot more than I ever did. Please, remember that everyone has their own limit and different happenings affect them in various ways. I’m not looking for any compassion but I want to share with you what I have learnt from my experiences.

  I tried so hard to run away from life . I hid from it, I looked for a reason of me being unhappy but I forgot about one important aspect- it was me who put myself in certain positions and situations because I focused so much on being lonely, sad & unhappy. 

One day, I woke up, looked in the mirror and told myself  – ‘ You are great, beautiful, talented because you are unique. There is no other person like you on the planet Earth. You can sob and complain about your life or change it.’

It took me three years to free myself from my ex husband. It took me another two years to gain back my confidence and happiness by appreciating the presence and what the Universe has given me. I keep in touch with my parents. I don’t hold any grudges. It’s not a fairy tale, my life hasn’t magically changed. My existence  is still far from being perfect. I struggle with things, I have problems like everybody else but I’m lucky because I’ve found myself.  I have discovered the appreciation and gratitude for simple things in life. My inner self  who had been suffocated and strangled by my fears for atleast 15 years  is finally present in my life. It consoles my soul and soothes my heart. 

My miserable time at work…

Life is real

Sometimes, my brain “feels like porridge”, I swear it does, however ridiculous it sounds. “Porridge brain” happens when to many things occupy my world, when personal problems and dilemmas gather together, when lovely and dear people who are above me at work cause me to scream internally (they just love the moments of making other people’s lives miserable), and on the top of that my laptop passed away…. R.I.P.

Coming back to the topic of work…