Rainbow

Precious Experiences

If you can’t see the rainbow after the storm make one yourself. The fortune is in your own hands and awaiting your approval !!!

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Existence

Precious Experiences

Do you look at other people who seem to fully enjoy their life?

Mental Health SeeSaw

Do you look at other people who seem to enjoy their life fully? They appear to be articulate, they bloom with self- confidence and splatter their optimism everywhere they go. ‘It’s highly contagious- this optymistic attire’- you think to yourself. ‘I shall be more like them’- you contemplate. Accidentally you get to know them better and surprisingly this bubble of joyful existence bursts. The magic has ended and the reality has kicked in… but why? How?

Life is made of different elements. Hence it would be simply impossible to stay high and ecstatic all the time (unless you relied on dope- which would be harmful anyway).

People who are naturally more outgoing and carry traits of an extrovert express themselves using social opportunities. These opportunities enable them to relax and unwind. They provide healthy balance for their mental wellbeing. Unsurprisingly, an introvert happily retrievs to their sanctuary doing whatever helps…

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Living in Pain

Precious Experiences

Every step I take brings me excrutiating pain. I move my body and I experience shattered glass lodged tightly in my back. I remain active despite the pain which makes me question myself-

Am I warrior?

or

Just a stupidly stubborn person who doesn’t give up but pull through the pain.

I’ve honestly had enough being physically restricted by neverending sensation of stubbing in my back.

I also found a new respect for people who suffer from chronic conditions which are accompanied by the pain. This pregnancy has been truly a humbling experience. It’s made me realise that the feeling of being tired is nothing to complain about where there are milions of people who are limited physicaly or bed ridden.

The picture above represents me in pain caused by sciatica. It portrays the current mood, the colour of it and struggles associated with it.

Eating Disorder Prior to Pregnancy

Precious Experiences

Mental self help for people suffered from an eating disorder prior to pregnancy.

Mental Health SeeSaw

You suffered from an eating disorder in the past, you successfully conquered it and moved on with your life but fell pregnant. How would you feel about your body if it started rapidly changing, if you were loosing control over your appearance and panicking about how quickly digits on a weighing scale increase in numbers. It’s a complete, utter and heartbreaking time which suppose to be filled with happy memories.

Are you being irrational?

Yes !!!

Why?

Because everyone knows that the body of an pregnant individual goes through the hormonal storm and a physical transformation. It’s a miracle and a real test of endurance for a person who suffered from an eating disorder in the past.

You are no longer in control and the lack of it puts you down and makes you feel anxious. It’s a truly complicated and tricky situation which causes so much fear and anxiety…

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Dear Twats

Precious Experiences

Dear Twats,

Dear Twats whom I may have known for a while and who reside on this beautiful and decying planet of Earth. I’ve had enough of your

parasitic,

narcissistic,

delusive

and

false

ways of interacting with other human beings. You are creatures of a betraying nature and most of all you use mental health as the main weapon of your choice. You have a beeping radar directed at people for whom mental health is extremely important. Your narcisitic nature allows you to adjust to people by getting to know them and changing your colours accordingly to their likes and deslikes. Somehow your attire is comparable to a lizard’s skin but you obviously don’t deserve this highly gracious comparison.

I would classify you as a pile of SHIT. A Pile of Shit is a person WHO changes their consistency depending on food eaten during the day.

The Pile of Shit is usually a puddle of foul content of wrongly digested edible matter. It’s like you, you devour people’s soul, you can’t digest it so you violently expel it using your anal & rectal ego and lies. When the conflict arises, you justify all your actions and behaviour blaming it on POOR SELF ESTEEM & BEING LOST.

Oh how sad !!!

Poor you, you are taken care of, carassed with self pity and when the pitty, bumpy surface of a friendship is smooth once again you repeat your offence over and over and over again.

Go back to the sewage.

Not so kind regards,

Victims of Twats in this world

Toxic Family and Pregnancy

Precious Experiences

How can you stay sane when you deal with toxic family members?

Mental Health SeeSaw

Where do I even begin?

How would you feel if your own mother didn’t respect you during pregnancy and was constantly jealous of your life? How would you feel if she made you feel guilty about ‘a better life’ ( according to her) because your brother is currently incarcerated for his own mistakes? How would you remain peaceful if she made you feel bad of the fact that other people were going to be involved more in looking after your baby daughter?

What if your therapist has opened your eyes by showing you that in fact you don’t have to entangle yourself in hours of meaningless, toxic and emotional conversation with your mother. They told you that she is an adult and it only depends on you if you allow her to mentally disturb you. If you contemplate on it you’ll assume that they are absolutely right. But there is…

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Pregnant Mental Chaos

Precious Experiences

First hand experience of pregnant mental chaos…

Mental Health SeeSaw

When you are trying for a baby and you are first time parent you read a lot, you anticipate and imagine what’s going to be like to carry a child under your heart and give birth to them. You go through different scenarious, you even dare to think that you are strong enough to be in control of your body & mind throughout the whole pregnancy and others who can’t cope are weak attention seekers.

You do a pregnancy test and you find out that you are in fact pregnant. You are overwhelmed and overjoyed with this wonderful news. You can’t believe your own eyes so you take one, two, three, four tests to just make sure that you are REALLY pregnant. You find a group of women on the internet who advise you that it’s best to control the raising level of pregnancy hormone by purchasing three digital pregnancy…

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Religious Trap

Precious Experiences

What if you are stuck in the religious trap ?

Mental Health SeeSaw

I have been through a lot, I have seen a lot and I have learnt a lot. What I have learnt about life is that it’s made of choices. We are decision makers not the Mighty God in heaven. Being brought up as a Roman Catholic I was always forced to believe that nothing is in my power, my destiny has been decided for me and I can’t do anything about it. I remember ( as a child) attending the mass at our local church and listening to a priest talking about sins, purgatory, hell and heaven. There was a set of rules to avoid further suffering after life ( the life is meant to be a nasty long trial which leads to heaven or hell) : confession, money donation, frequent church attendance, prayer, prayer, prayer and overwhelming fear of everything which might be considered evil ( because that surely…

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Bumpy Bump

Precious Experiences

The truth about pregnancy.

Mental Health SeeSaw

Before getting pregnant I thought I knew everything about the whole pregnancy thing. I thought I was prepared and had it all figured all. Surprise, surprise I’ve been unprepared not only for a load of physical symptoms but also for mental health overload.

It feels like I’ve been on a rollercoaster which never slows down, never stops but constantly accelerates. I barely have control over it but I still need to hold it together. Which I do but it’s heck of a challenge.

What do I do to help myself?

First of all, I’ve been talking about my feelings and emotions out loud. I find it very therapeutic to be able to share them with my partner Ian.

Secondly, I’ve been taking it easy when I need by using coping techniques from active meditation. The active meditation is all about being aware of the present moment and focusing on breathing.

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Anxiety & Active Meditation

Precious Experiences

When anxiety strikes…

Mental Health SeeSaw

This lovely picture of Meg depicts my facial expression when I’m engulfed in waves of anxiety while desperately trying to practise active meditation.

When you ever experience a wave of overwhelming anxiety caused by the past events which are stored in your wicked brain just let them float on the surface of fear and insecurity. It will sail away if you don’t fight it. If you try to push it back it will resist and stay with you longer than it should. Someone would call it a complete and utter misery but on the other hand it’s better to be miserable for short while, bear in mind, it’s only temporary and you won’t wilt like a sad dandelion without air and water but you blossom like a lilly.

I look at it as at a temporary shut down of the system due to an upgrade where few bugs need to…

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